Lunar Interlude 2

[balancemod]

Let's try to keep the paperwork to a minimum, shall we? NAVIGATION 1. NEW RECLAIMERS A. WELCOME WELCOME! FAH WHO RAHMUS For the nine of you who will be arriving today, the story is the same: though you may not remember it, there was a moment where you were living out your life, at home or wherever you were ... and then there was the moment the Hunger came. And amid the television static that is your memory of that moment, a hand reached out to you, beckoning your escape as the tendrils of darkness destroyed everything that ever existed about your world. "Would you hurry this up, please? Your world no longer stands a chance. Come with me, we are the last bastions of hope for all universes everywhere. And we're going to need you." And then, unceremoniously, you are dragged through the universal wringer and plopped down on the soft, though not quite cushioned, grass of the Moon Base Quad. There are other people out in the grassy fields — they may even be people you recognize. They may just be strangers, other Reclaimers, who recognize what you're about to endure. The things they say may be interspersed with static — as if the words themselves aren't reaching your ears correctly. And you have a few minutes to chat before you're calmly led away by Bureau administration, to do something about that pesky static problem. B. THE VOIDFISH The nine of you are quickly divided into two groups, and brought to the easternmost geodesic dome, to an elevator in a well maintained, but sparsely landscaped field. There's nothing particularly ominous feeling about the space — in fact, the two guards who greet you at the elevator entrance seem pleased with your arrival. You are, after all, one of the few chosen by the Director, the few who will reclaim what the Hunger has destroyed. And in a few moments, you're about to find that out for yourself. After a tightly packed elevator ride, your group is ushered out to a rather grand looking hall, banners of the Bureau of Balance adorn both sides of smooth metal walls. And inside the Voidfish's chamber stands a tank — impossibly tall, and soaked in a black ink that obscures whatever the tank may be holding. You may notice the sound of someone speaking. It's a bard, on his second round of introducing Reclaimers to the Voidfish, and this time, he has chosen to demonstrate the functions of the outrageously vertical tank not by playing violin music, but by reciting a piece of classical, and highly valued poetry. When he finishes, he pulls at a drawer just at the metallic base of the tank. He solemnly enters a few scrolls into its basin as the tank begins to light up, like lightning behind dark clouds. And suddenly, you forget what that invaluable example of universal literature sounded like. "Yeah, man, like... don't think too hard about it, it's like that every time. I'm guessing you're here to be inoculated? Just a heads up, you might want to, like, seriously, hold your nose while you drink it down. It tastes wicked gross, man. Anyway, I'm supposed to tell you that you have a choice. If you drink the black stuff, you'll be able to hear through the, uh... Huh, how do I describe it? Through the [TSHCSCHTSHCHSC] sound. You guys like, hear that? Anyway, it's all about knowledge or something. I don't know, I'm just here to, like, feed the thing. We call it the [TSCHHSCHSCH], by the way. So, like. You get a choice. You can drink it and understand stuff, or not drink it and then hear that crackling noise all day every day. If I were you, I'd drink it. But, hey man, I'm not like, your dad or anything." The bard takes five cups and draws liquid from a spigot connected directly to the basin of the large tank. Stormy, muddy looking ichor is drawn into them, one by one. He offers each of you a sip. Drink it (he wasn't kidding about what it tasted like), and you're inoculated to the wisdom of the Voidfish. You try to remember the poetry this bard recited a few moments ago and the rhymes, the meter, the significance, all come back to you. And if you think back to your arrival, some of the things you may have heard other people in the Quad say, that simply sounded like static, are suddenly clear. Bureau of Balance. Grand Relic. Reclaimers. Yet you still can't remember the Hunger or what it had done to your world. And as you look back to the tank in front of you, the water has become clear. There's a jellyfish, as tall as a building, floating within. You look into the body of the creature and you can almost make out a beautiful, tiny universe floating within it. 2. THE TEST OF INITIATION With your new knowledge on the Bureau of Balance and your purpose here in tow, you are led without hesitation to the Arena, where the final phase of your initiation into the Bureau will be held. You are partnered up, whether it is with someone you drank the ichor of the Voidfish with, or perhaps even a veteran Reclaimer, who either stopped by to help, or simply out of curiosity. One Grand Relic has already been reclaimed, you're told. They were a pair of bright red mittens, held by the mayor of a small village who may have meant well, but under the draw of the mittens' incredible space-bending powers, was corrupted into using them, and to nearly killing everyone who lived under him. You may have noticed, at some point while glancing out into space while walking here, to the planet below, a massive evergreen fir that stretches past the planet's atmosphere, very nearly piercing the Moon Base itself. It appears to be decorated for the holidays. That tree is the direct result of those mittens, the actions of a man who could not resist the temptation to use them. Resisting that very same temptation is your task here. And with that order in mind, as you and your partner stand in the middle of the Arena, the walls dissolve, and the simulation begins. You're standing in the middle of a forest. Ahead of you, situated on a pedestal, is an item. It could be any ordinary item: a pair of gloves, a teapot, a simple decorative bowl. Whatever it is, it's yours for the taking. Take that simple item in your hands, however, and the building blocks of the trees around you suddenly collapse like shattered glass, and reform into new scenery — it may even be a place from home that you recognize. A voice in your head beckons you. Perhaps there's a mistake you made, or something that went wrong for you back home that you wish you had the power to undo. Perhaps there's someone you wish you could help, or even save. The item that's in your hands has the power to help you achieve this, if only you'd ever use it. Resist the temptation. Take the item, and drop it into a nearby deposit box to be destroyed. Your partner is here to help you — because once you destroy it, you will be doing the same for them. 3. NEWBIES AND VETERANS, AROUND THE MOONBASE Three or four days into the month, now that the newbies are settled in, something strange happens: The next time you return to your flat from whatever errand or exploring you were doing, when attempting to use your Bracer to open the door results in extremely obnoxious beeping that persists for an entire thirty seconds, and a message on the screen next to the door. ERROR: HOME ASSIGNMENT MECHANISM MALFUNCTION. GO TAKE A WALK. Welp. Looks like you're locked out for a bit while techs fix that. Here's a few places that might be worth checking out. A. PIECES FROM HOME Should you find your way to the Dojo, there's a door that still has that shiny, brand spanking new door look and new door smell to it off in one of the less traversed corners of the building. A sign next to the door demands that you empty your pockets before entering. A scanner for your Bracer will unlock it, assuming it's unoccupied, leading you to a plain white room with no furniture or objects at all in sight. As the door shuts behind you, a pleasant female voice echoes from all corners of the room, greeting you by name. If this is your first time in the room, the voice has a simple question for you: "What memory do you value, or think of, most?" Once you've provided your answer, the walls crumble, much like they did during the Test of Initiation simulation, reforming into something that is, again, pleasantly, or even unpleasantly, familiar. It's a space from home. Perhaps it's your room. Perhaps it's your favorite restaurant (though, the place is curiously empty, and the food you find, for some reason, tastes like strawberries). Perhaps it's a park you always enjoyed visiting, or a corner of the city you lived in. Whatever it is, you, and whoever you may have brought along with you, seem to be the only ones there. And perhaps the details aren't quite right — like maybe someone built a model of your home to explore, but a few pieces were missing from the box. But it's close enough. B. SPEND YOUR DOUGH. SOLVE A MYSTERY Whether you're a newcomer or a veteran returning from your first Field Mission, you've been provided with some spending money. You can use it to buy yourself one weapon and piece of armor from one of the blacksmiths in town. Regardless of who you choose to help you out with that, it'll take about a week to complete your order, so time your purchase carefully. There's also premade weapons and a whole bunch of other bullshit for sale at FANTASY COSTCO. Shelves and pallets of an endless array of nonmagical items, pretty much anything you can imagine, can be bought here, but there's one particular, innocuous item that seems to have Garfield the Deals Warlock in a tizzy. The more those vinyl covers that can be used to decorate your Bracers are purchased, the more the name seems to spread, ghosts of whispers around the entire Moon Base, of a person who may very well be a ghost herself. Who is Miss Zarves? Who was Miss Zarves? A powerful witch with the power to scramble your memories, insists one cantankerous woman who pours you a drink at Madame Frione's Tea Kettle. A heavyset, flushed with drink sort of man sitting next to you disagrees — Miss Zarves is a practical joke Garfield likes to trot out every couple of months to mess around with anybody gullible enough to believe him. Whatever the case, it seems that the name alone gives everyone a curious case of déjà vu. Someone has to have information on her — and this is the Reclaimers' opportunity to hone their information gathering skills. C. A (PERHAPS MANDATORY) DAY AT STOP DYING 101 Whether you're in class voluntarily, or whether you were dragged there on account of dying the past Field Mission, today's session of Fatalistic Fauna, and Danger Sense to channel your inner barbarian is going on a little field trip to the Arena. Because this is your first test to see if you can put all that information that's been given to you in the first few lectures to good use. You and a partner are placed in the middle of the Arena, in a simulation of an expansive, empty field, up against the first monster you were introduced to in class: A Bulette, a fearsome beast that can burrow, lunge, deal severe piercing damage, and jump an absolutely incredible distance. And you and your Reclaimer partner are absolutely no match for it. Your only option here is to escape. Can you? If you are dealt simulated fatal damage, then the Arena will dissolve back to normal, and you'll be given extra homework and reading material for the day. Sorry, them's the breaks. D. OPEN THE DOOR, GET ON THE FLOOR, EVERYBODY DO THE DINOSAUR There's a signup available for those looking to take Dance lessons at the Academy. There seem to be enough slots available for 50 or so people, and the form's name simply reads: "DANCE, NOW. WITH MS. CHARLOTTE." It's a pretty large time commitment- a crash course in dancing is a rather intensive affair. You'll be spending 4 days a week for 2 weeks, 2-3 hours per day, learning all the basics of the waltz, the tango, and the quickstep. Don't even think about trying the cha-cha slide here, it's simply not pasodoable. At the studio, you can borrow a pair of ballet slippers and join in with Ms. Charlotte, which, for anyone coming to the class for the first time should be rightly horrified. The newest member of the Bureau of Balance is a spider. A delegate from New New Aspen, Ms. Charlotte comes equipped with a bracer of her own, has taken in the Voidfish juice, and relocated here, to teach at the Academy. She moonlights as a ballroom dance instructor and a coach, and boy... she's pretty demanding with her approach, but incredibly thorough. You don't want to let Ms. Charlotte down. The sessions she teaches will get you to learn the basics. Natural aptitude, of course, goes a long way, but she's very 8-hands on with her approach at correcting posture and steps. Not without compassion, however, if you manage to get blisters on your feet, Ms. Charlotte's web bandages will set and help heal those sore, tired feet. The next 2 weeks of this boot camp are going to be brutal. E. THE MOON IS YOUR SPACE OYSTER (WILDCARD) There are plenty of other locations around the Moon Base that you can explore at your own discretion. Feel free to refer to the Settings page for more ideas on what shenanigans you can get into. Additionally, we'll be fielding Bender rolls again this month! With the exception of the three items that have been removed from his recipe database, if a food item was destroyed in a failed roll previously, you may roll to try to fix it. Bear in mind, of course, that you may make it worse. Successful food rolls will stay in place at this time. 4. THE DIRECTOR ACTS; A GRAND RELIC DESTROYED Erika has obtained and delivered the Space Mittens to Madame Director herself. She struggles to remain calm and composed at the moment, but the amount of immense pride and relief at recovering the Grand Relic slips through an otherwise sturdy exterior of coolness and level-headed features. She congratulates the entirety of the Bureau of Balance for their hard work, and relates to Erika that she couldn't be happier that she had made this world one step closer to being safe. A message will appear across all bracers, everywhere, with the following: Reclaimers, welcome home and congratulations on a successful first mission. Although there were certain drawbacks and difficult decisions that had to be made, I believe, without a doubt, that you all have irrefutably surpassed all expectations. Congratulations on a job well done. However, next time, please do be more careful out there. For those of you who wish to watch, my office will remain open until 1600 hours today. The relic will be destroyed, and if you would like to attend to see how it's done, please stop by. There will be light refreshments and coffee served, of course. If unable to attend, you can watch the ceremony later on your bracers. Don't forget to click Like and Subscribe. At the appointed hour, a ceremony will occur. She calls forth Davenport to wheel out the structure that's been created and designed with the sole purpose of destroying these things. She dare not takes the relic herself, no, refusing to touch the item at all. It's a medium sized metallic sphere, and once opened and closed, can never be opened again. Pulling back the curtain to an observatory, the Reclaimers can watch as Davenport sports a nifty pair of goggles, and wheels the orb onto a raised platform. He waits for the Director's signal, which is performed by an agreeable stamp of her oaken staff against the floor, and a nod. Davenport hits the KILL SWITCH, and the light show from behind the glass is amazing and terrifying all at the same time. You watch as the Space Mittens are obliterated from existence. An eruption of cheering breaks out. This concludes the first successful mission, and a deeply needed win, for the Bureau of Balance. blurb code by photosynthesis

Comments

[gotyourbach]

Akechi-kun...

[She knows how important the performance was to him. Their test together had more than covered that in intimate detail. But getting the chance to just be himself, away from the stage...

As she'd thought during their test, it's not something she'd ever had to worry about. There was never anything to stop her from just existing as she was. In fact, it was always encouraged.

Without hesitation, she offers him her hand, resting it on the counter for him to take if he wants.]

Is this where you met them, then? Kurusu-kun, Sakamoto-kun, and the others?

[grakraka]

[Kaede truly is so considerate. It's why he doesn't mind being honest with her like this. With a gentle smile, he places his hand next to hers.]

Oh, no. I met them before I knew who they were or anything about this place. They were on a field trip to learn how television is filmed and I happened to be filming both days of the trip. It was in the early days of their, ah, career. The first day was a little embarrassing... [God. The worst part is knowing, in retrospect, that they remembered him from that. Trying to befriend them hilariously worked against him. He's not going to mention that detail, though. Mostly just because it was so stupid of him.] I don't think I made a good first impression on them either day. The interview was about the Phantom Thieves and Akira was chosen for an audience question. It was pretty fun to argue with him, though, and since it so happened we took the same train, after that day I would talk to him while we waited, whenever I happened to see him.

[gotyourbach]

Huh. ...That's a really weird kind of luck.

[She doesn't go so far as to say "fate," because that seems a little much. It's certainly one heck of a coincidence, though!

Her fingers brush his as she turns, taking another look around the cafe. There aren't any other people, because of course there aren't. Somehow, it doesn't seem strange to picture this place like this, almost empty. Maybe she's just biased from Akechi's description, though.]

I'm... really glad you had a place like this to come to back then. Even with everything that happened... I'm really happy you can revisit something like this.

Have... you thought about inviting them in here? Kurusu-kun and Sakamoto-kun?

[grakraka]

[Although he doesn't comment on it, he breathes out something almost like a laugh, too soft and brief to be anything noteworthy. Maybe it was a sigh? Or it might have been Akechi laughing to himself that nothing was ever really a coincidence in a game of chess between a shit God and humanity. Seeing him that day and having their little debate was enough to interest him. All he's ever needed was the opportunity to ruin his own life.

Akechi smiles at her and this time he really does sigh.]

No. Of course not. I think it's quite shameful that I'm so attached to this place. The worst thing that could happen would be for them to know.

[He toys with the ends of his hair.] I was such a pest to them. I'm sure in their eyes, the fact that I spent so many nights here indulging my own needs was annoying. I don't know. The memories become more... mixed when they're involved.

[gotyourbach]

...

[She hums musically, a lilting up-and-down noise, then she reaches out and pokes his cheek with one finger. Watching him toy with his hair is cute, but doubting himself isn't.]

I don't think it's shameful. You found a place where you could be yourself... if it were somewhere I lived, I know it would make me happy. And maybe if it wouldn't have at the time... you and Kurusu-kun are better friends now, I'm sure. He'd understand.

I mean... isn't it nice, to share happy memories with someone? You both must have different things you can share about a place you both spent so much time in.

[grakraka]

[But he doesn't think anything he has to share would be anything worth sharing, especially not about here with them. Maybe their relationships have changed—he agrees that they have, too, though he's not sure if they've really settled their other feelings about him yet—but he remembers distinctly how unwelcome he felt here whenever they were around.

And he doesn't blame them at all. He didn't approach them with kind intentions, so there was never a reason to care about him back then. But even so, it wasn't a good feeling. It was a little too familiar.

Maybe the truth is that he selfishly wants to keep this place for himself this time, where he can just have a space to be alone; no pressure or need to think through everything or unpleasant memories or people associated with them, no matter the changes that have occurred since then.

But he can't really do that, can he? Akechi clears his throat to clear the thoughts away.]

Yes, you're probably right. I'll consider it at least.

[gotyourbach]

...Hmm.

[She doesn't sound convinced, but she doesn't push it. There are some things she's adamant on, things she'll push and push and push until the other breaks down and gives in. But in this case, it's truly something that's Akechi's decision to make. All she can do is offer her argument, provide her supporting evidence, and let him go from there.]

Well... I'm glad you invited me in here with you. The atmosphere is really soothing, like --

[Clair de Lune dies unspoken on her lips, a lurch to her heart like she'd missed a step at the bottom of a staircase. For once, she's at a loss for a piano piece, mentally scrambling for any other song.]

Satie's Gymnopédie.

[It fits, but it's not the first one that came to mind.]

[grakraka]

[The pause surprises him, if only because she clearly had something in mind before it. Akechi frowns slightly and puts his hand over hers.]

Are you all right? You know I wouldn't judge a piece you thought would fit it better.

[Not that it doesn't. It's a lovely choice. But he hopes she isn't worried about his reaction.]

[gotyourbach]

Huh?

[Of course he'd notice. Of course he'd notice. He's too observant not to.

She turns her hand over without a second thought, letting her fingers gently rest against the back of his hand.]

...O-oh... no, that's not it. I'm not worried about being judged for something like that, it's...

[She inhales, breathing in a scent of spices and coffee that's so foreign to anything she might have experienced in that bizarre academy, then lets out that breath in a quiet sigh.]

There's a song I wanted to play for Saihara-kun. I just... thought of it now.

[She starts and stops a few times, trying to explain further, before giving up and simply adding,] Debussy's... Clair de Lune. It's a soothing melody that fills your heart and eases your mind. Like... the reflection of the moon on the water.

[grakraka]

[He can tell how difficult this is for her and so he listens without trying to speak at all.]

...Yes, it's lovely piece. It would be an excellent choice.

[Though it's hard for him to tell if regrets over her choices are the only thing that bother her at the moment.]

I know how much music means to you. If I can help you to reclaim joy in a song you like so much, I would like to offer to do it, whatever might help for you.

[gotyourbach]

...

[She laughs, a quiet, humorless exhale of breath as she rests her chin in her other hand, fingertips drumming lightly against her cheek to release some nervous energy.]

You're... really kind, Akechi-kun, [she answers first, giving him a smile more genuine than her laugh had been, though no less tired.] But... I don't know what you could do to help.

[She opens her mouth as if she might continue, but doesn't seem to know where to begin. So she just closes her mouth, purses her lips around her words as if trying to find the right one, then just shakes her head without letting go of his hand. It's just a song, mentioned like she's mentioned so many before and so many since. But in that moment, it had seemed special. Like even if he didn't know it, if he'd never heard it, her description and her promise to play it for him made a real difference.]

...I wish you could have met him, [she says instead, looking down at their joined hands.] Saihara-kun. I think... you'd have been good friends.

[grakraka]

[Sometimes people can't really help. Most times, he thinks, but he is surprised Kaede was honest about it. Even if he wishes he could do something, he nods and waits for her to continue the thought she seems to be struggling with.

When she does, he blinks, then hesitates.]

Oh, I don't know about that. [A real detective would no doubt take personal offense to Akechi's crimes.] But I would have liked to have met someone so important to you either way.

[gotyourbach]

[Oh yeah, Shuichi would forgive and forget much harder than Kaede would, that's for sure. But what Shuichi doesn't know wouldn't hurt him.

Even after she'd encouraged him to look toward the truth, to keep pushing forward, she'd still try to keep things from him, huh? Kaede rests her free arm on the bar and pillows her head on it, closing her eyes with a sigh.]

I don't get it, [she says finally, voice slightly muffled.] I only knew everybody for a few days, so why... does it still hurt so much to think about them?

[grakraka]

[Akechi reaches out, putting his hand on her back and gently rubbing it. He's seen people do that before and it always seemed to help.]

I've found it's less about how long or how well you know someone and more about what they bring to your life.

[Even now, he wouldn't say he knows Akira and Ryuji well. But he knows how they make him feel. He knows that even if he wasn't close to the others, he can't help wondering what they would make of all of this, how they would do in the situation.]

Missing people truly has little to do with anything more than just wanting them in your life.

[gotyourbach]

Oh...

[She tenses briefly at the unexpected touch before relaxing almost as quickly with a soft sigh. Her first instinct isn't to think anyone means her harm, after all, and definitely not Akechi.]

I never thought about it that way... but I guess you're right. I barely got the chance to know everybody before...

[She sighs, turning her head to glance up at him with a small, almost embarrassed smile.]

...Sorry. You came here to relax, and I'm just talking about myself again. I can be quiet if you want to read.

[No matter that she came here in the middle of the night to use the room herself; she isn't going to make it all about her.]

[grakraka]

[He shakes his head, smiling as he keeps rubbing her back.]

Not at all. You're a relaxing presence to have around but even if you weren't, I enjoy talking to you, including when you're feeling down. If it helps to talk about them, then I'm happy to listen. If there is something else you'd prefer, then we can talk about that instead.

[He really just can't leave her feeling down, though, or lost in her thoughts. Even if she's a spirited girl, she's holding onto a lot of grief and regrets. She's trying so hard to cheer them all on, so if sparing a night or two listening to her helps at all, he really doesn't see how he could say no.]

[gotyourbach]

[She flushes a light shade of pink, letting out a little noise of embarrassment and hiding her face in her arms. That's a lot of compliments to give out so easily! Being a relaxing presence, being someone he likes talking to, no matter the circumstance...]

You're really kind to me, Akechi-kun. I just don't know what else there is to say.

[She taps a gentle, restless rhythm against the bar with her fingertips -- Liszt's transcription for solo piano of one of Schubert's Ständchen, "Leise flehen meine Lieder."

When she speaks again, it's very soft, her head tilting just enough so she can try to catch a glimpse of his expression.]

...Do you ever... dwell on what happened? The things you did?

[grakraka]

[The song brings a smile, even if she's restless. But the question takes him off guard. His expression dulls slightly as he nods.]

Of course I do. Quite often, if I'm honest.

[All he did for the past two and a half years was grant Shido's desires. Before then, he was nothing at all. After, even if he was a pawn, he was something at least.

But it doesn't leave much to think about in regards to himself.]

I don't dwell on 'what-ifs' when I doubt it could have gone any other way. It's a pointless exercise. But I can't help thinking about all of it regardless. [He gives a dry laugh.] Maybe I would think about it a little less if I had been able to tell my father to fuck off.

[gotyourbach]

Really?

[Her fingers still, eyes widening a little. She hadn't expected that... it's reassuring, really. She wishes more than anything that Akechi hadn't had to go through what he did, but...

It definitely means they have a strong bond between them, doesn't it?

Her fingers start drumming gently against the wood again. If he'd been able to tell his father to leave him alone, then he wouldn't have had to do all those things he did. Then he wouldn't have to suffer the same way she is.]

I don't know if it'll help, but... do you want to tell me? What you think you'd tell him, if you could have. You know, like... getting it out in the open, instead of letting it fester.

[grakraka]

[He can't help staring at her in surprise. Even if she offers it in such a carefree way, he knows she must realise the weight of an offer like that.]

I don't really know what I would have say in practice... In theory, though... I must have imagined it thousands of different ways over the years.

[Even before he approached him, he dreamed of somehow making him pay, of somehow hurting him as much as he had hurt Akechi.]

I can't... say such terrible things at you.

[gotyourbach]

[She sits up, pulling her hand from the table to gently pat his cheek. It's brief, just enough of a touch to make sure his attention is on her before she pulls her hand back. She does know what she's offering, even if she can't know what he would say.]

You'd be saying them at me, not to me. I know the difference, Akechi-kun. And...

[She takes a breath, fingers twining into the hem of her skirt as she gives him a bit of a smile.]

I can express all my terrible thoughts through music. I don't have to keep it to myself. And... you don't have to keep it to yourself, either. If you don't want to.

[grakraka]

[She really is such a sweet girl. He tries to think what he would say. It's a little hard now, removed from it all, when Shido is dead and that whole world is gone It isn't as though his anger has cooled—unfortunately, it really hasn't—but he has more than it now. Putting himself back into that mindset feels like something he shouldn't do. But it's so much easier to think of what to say if he just lets his feelings go on it.

Akechi draws his fingertips down the counter towards himself before curling them. He doesn't look at Kaede, staring at some of the tins of coffee on the wall instead.]

I always... wanted to ask if he remembered my mother. I barely do. I think that vague memory became warped the more time went on. But I wanted to know why he abandoned someone who would have willingly been with such an abhorrent, disgusting man like him. He should have been grateful to her everyday and instead he left her burdened with me.

I wanted to know if he knew I was out there, his bastard child. I suppose he did. He probably didn't know what life he'd condemned me to, maybe... or maybe he read about her suicide one day and just didn't care to come take responsibility for me. I always hated that he had a choice. Children don't ask to be born. [Instead of raising, his voice grows softer, deeper. The more controlled it becomes, though, the more the edge to it seems to sharpen.] I didn't ask for a weak-willed woman and a no-good man to bring me into this world with no desire for me in the first place. Why did he have a choice to let me languish and suffer with no future? He gets to pursue his dream of being prime minister and I was supposed to, what? Be dumped out of the system with half my education unfinished and nothing to my name? And he thinks he has any right to steer a country while I rotted?

[By now his hand has become a fist. He still doesn't lose control over the level of his voice but somehow, it might be less angry sounding if he yelled.]

I want to watch him suffer. I want him to be looked at the way I was looked at all my life. I want him to feel people stare at him as though he is an unforgivable sin incarnate and know that is the only future that awaits him before he falls into obscurity where no one even looks at him anymore. They won't notice him at all anymore. A fate worse than death, to just be forgotten. He can waste away in hell and beg for attention and even if he dies, even if he threatens to take his own life, it will never get him a single person who will ever turn his way again. He'll simply have to live, knowing not a single person cares if he dies and never will. If he becomes better, it will never matter. I want him to suffer that until he draws his last breath alone.

[gotyourbach]

[She isn't sure what she was expecting. Shouting, definitely, swearing, probably. The quiet is almost more discomforting than if he'd wanted to scream at her.

Kaede slips off the chair when he finishes, wraps her arms around him without hesitation to pull him close. Her heart is beating far too quickly, listening to him go on and on like that; it's scary, knowing that he has those feelings locked away inside, and there's nothing she can do to help. Shido's dead. The whole world that might remember him is dead, too, and in spite of herself, in spite of knowing how many innocent people are dead alongside him, she can't help but think good, that the man who caused Akechi so much suffering is nowhere but inside their own heads.

She can forgive people who've wronged her, but it's much, much harder when it's a friend. Her fingertips brush through his hair for a moment before she realizes something, something she'd normally recoil from with how much she cares about having people remember...]

I'd say we should feed him to the Voidfish, but I wouldn't want to get it sick, [she murmurs, and she means it. Even if everyone who knew who he was is dead alongside him already, there's just something satisfying about wiping him from existence entirely, forever. Her voice is quiet and very, very still as she rests her other hand on his closed fist and adds,] Just... write it all down, all the hate, all the horrible things he's done, and then obliterate him, for good.

[grakraka]

[It isn't the reaction he expected but when she hugs him, his eyes shut and he presses into it. The way she touches his hair soothes him somehow, some of the tension leaving his shoulders.

What gets him the most, though, is how angry she seems on his behalf. Before, no matter where he looked, there was no one who would have validated the pain he felt. Ironically, Shido always seemed the closest to validating it, as if he knew everything. Well. He probably did always know. That only made it worse.

But Kaede believes him and she tells him he didn't deserve that. It's enough to make him hug her back, holding tight for a moment as he feels something close to relief. She listened and she agrees, in a way, that he should have been the one in pain instead.]

I think... I have far too many grievances with him to do that easily.

[And truthfully, even if he dumped them all on him, they weren't all him. The other caregivers who hurt him and abandoned him, the kids who taunted him, the adults who blamed him for his mother's death, the society that let it all happen without care...

Even if he does hate the world, it was easier to just hate one man for it all.]

[gotyourbach]

[She can feel some of the tension dissipating, so she keeps her fingers in his hair, gently stroking through the strands as if that might help ground him in the moment. She'd hated Shido already from what she knew during the initiation test, and she hates him even more now, in this moment.

It's funny, she never used to think she could be capable of hating anyone. She hates Monokuma, she hates the idea that there could have been a mastermind, but the mastermind, if they existed, was a faceless entity, and Monokuma and the Monokubs were robot teddy bears. But she hates Shido, because of what he'd done to Akechi. Because Akechi's suffering, even now.

She takes a deep breath, holds him close, fingers shaking a little against the back of his head.]

Do you feel any better...? Be honest.