Lunar Interlude 5 — Part 2

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FINALLY. NAVIGATION 1. IN THE NOT-SO DISTANCE: A TRAIN A. GET YOUR BOARDING PASSES READY As your friendly neighborhood interplanal technomancer mentioned earlier, a pocket dimension the Bureau of Balance had been using for storage got kind of ... well, infected is probably the most accurate word for it. And for a multitude of reasons, most of them for her own gain, Miss Zarves has unlocked the door and guided you toward the entrance. It's contained on one of the locked floors above your quarters on the Moon Base. And once you step through the entrance and get a load of what she's been yammering about ... boy. That is most definitely a hell of a train. It's parked at a single solitary station, the air both smells and exhudes a general sense of unease and steam, and the cars seem to stretch on into forever. Much like infected was the most accurate word earlier, "demonic" is probably what works best right now. Best steel yourself. And hang on tight to that diamond Miss Zarves told you to bring along (Dr. Tank is throwing a fit over having to dole them out, btw). You've got a director to fetch, after all. B. THE TRAIN'S CARS This bad boy (evil boy, demonic boy, whatever you're in the mood to refer to this thing that is definitely not Doomtrain (but probably is Doomtrain for those in the know)) comes equipped with the luxury status that befits its 5* Zagart rating. As you pull up to one of the many compartments, you'll notice that the landing zone is pretty much the same for every car that's currently parked at the station. Down the line, of course, you can't even make out the beginning or the end of this monstrosity, and as you touch the edifice (that is, if you're brazen enough to do so), you can can swear you feel a warm, beating sensation under the literal ton of steel facing you. The rules of this train ride of the impossible are written firmly on a neat placard across from the entrance way. Doors will remain locked until you agree to the ToS set forth by... well, who you can only assume is the Conductor. Decided to enter? Well, there's a lot to do here! Go be lazy somewhere else! ○ The Seating Cars. They're perfect for sitting in on long journeys. If you look outside the window you'll see neon lights swirling around in the distance. No matter where you go or what you do, it doesn't actually look like this train is going anywhere. You wouldn't want to go anywhere anyway, right? So just have a seat! You'll find yourself feeling pretty chill about sitting. So much so that it might be hard to get up. Thoughts just tend to slip away while you wait. And wait you will. Forever! Unless someone can snap you out of it. Loot table: Sleepy time tea set (a set of 6 teabags that when distilled and imbibed have the same effect of the Sleep spell), any book from your home world, a memento from someone you knew before coming to the Bureau, an unsolvable crossword puzzle ○ The Art Gallery Car. You've wound up in an empty car with paintings to your left and right. Some of these cars have portraits of stuffy old people watching you, wherever you go. When you pass one, you'll hear one of them say something incredibly insulting towards you that strikes a deep nerve within. Turn around to get a better look, and guess what? It's just a painting, what were you actually expecting? Other Art Gallery cars will show idyllic landscapes, that ripple when you touch the paint within them. Can you pass through to the other side? You certainly can. You'll notice that everything in these vast, barren wastelands contains ridiculous things that were once deposed of by the Bureau of Balance. One of them might have an industrial sized dump of old uniforms. You can see that Lucretia absolutely had a fashion designer come in and spruce up the digs. You'll find endless, and we really... really do mean endless fields of pizza sauce vats that sprawl entire pocket-within-pocket dimensions. Other ones will contain, as you guessed it, Fantasy Costco flyers. They're of varying quality. Entire pockets of failed machinery that was once met for the Bureau's sustaining devices on the moon are located here as well. If you can think it up, and it's garbage... there's a highly good chance that a painting can lead you here. The worst type of Art Gallery cars will let you enter a painting that spits you out on another side of the train. Or worse, commit you straight up into an MC Escher landscape of winding stairs leading to nowhere and are nearly impossible to escape out of. Even worse than that? Paintings that you step into that show you a complete reverse of everything on the other side. Colors, shapes, sizes- it's Picasso all the way down from here. At least it's fun to look at it, albeit mostly harmless. Loot table: Painting supplies, Blank canvases, Jars of pizza sauce (one tablespoon is as filling as a whole meal, 24 uses), Clothing already on your body but in complete color reversals ○ The Club Car. Eventually, you'll find your way to a car that's brimming with the sweet and sultry blues sound of the Runaway Five, a group wearing suits and neat hats that seem to play some of the best music you've heard in a while. Upon entering, you'll notice that your wardrobe has been redone into the flapper style of the 20s. This is one hell of a speakeasy. Take a load off, grab a drink, socialize. If you manage to get a word in with the Runaway Five, you'll find that the Devil Went Down to Neverwinter was quite a literal thing here. They might've sold their soul for fame, but for one and one night only, they're here to liven up the joint. Too bad this place seems to exist in a perpetual state of night. Oof. Be careful with who you make contracts with. Loot table: Music sheets, handheld musical instruments (ocarina, flute, kazoo, etc), one bottle of extremely potent alcohol, your flapper outfit ○ The Dining Car. Towards the front of the train... or what you can assume to be the front of the train, is a dining car that's absolutely disproportionate in every sense of the word. As you enter, you realize that you're about the size of a safety pin in comparison to everything else in the room. Giant swaths of cheese boards make walking on the moon look like an easy task. Goblets of wine can appear to be a hot tub of drunken goodness. Take a stroll on the pillowy soft landscape of the bread flatlands. And, eventually... make your way to a literal mountain of Jello. There's something dark and shadowy on the inside of it, if you'd like to get digging. Who knows what could be under there, though? Loot table: Weapons in the shape of utensils that never rust or dull, slices of cake that never seem to go bad, small jello pet that seems sentient and fits in the palm of your hand, a jalapeno pepper that when ingested allows you to breathe fire once ○ OOC/Etc. We're really open to seeing how you go wild with this log. Feel free to make up any sort of car you can imagine and throw it together. The key element here is leaning on the absurd, if you haven't gotten the idea yet, and we'll be keeping an eye out to see what you all end up creating on this hellish train ride to... well, you'll see. Notice that there are loot tables up there? Well, if you've read the ToS Agreement, you'll know you're allowed to take one item out of here. It's yours to keep! Lastly, if your party winds up truly lost and can't make heads or tails of the train (and even as you get to the very front, where you think the Conductor's car is, you'll eventually get sent back to the very first car on the train), you can always follow a mouse with a sign. It'll lead you on a maze of forward and back shenanigans until you find yourself... at the station where you began. Wait, was this thing ever actually moving!? C. THE OTHER SIDE OF THE MOON At some point, though, assuming you don't get lost, you will approach a painting that is a chaotic mess of bright colors splashed across a dark black canvas. This is the last stop before you reach the Engine and, presumably, whoever it is actually conducting this thing. And considering all those other paintings you probably stumbled through on your way here, you know what to do with this one. The other side of the painting, at first, is pitch black. Then, like flashlights blinking on, a splash of color. Then, another. They spread out like a web to reveal an entire second Moon Base, contoured in neon lights. You're not going to find some Other Side Garfield running the Other Side Fantasy Costco (we don't want to torture you quite that much). But you will find that the layout of the domes, of the trees, of the buildings, is correct down to the last detail. And you're not going to find any other living creatures — you are going to find nothing but monsters. Art that melts off the wall and springs at you. If you happen to wander to where your room is supposed to be, you might find that the item that's most precious to you has suddenly sprouted limbs and is attempting to shatter your bones. Yes, you can fight the moonside version of Bender (we don't particularly recommend it, however! He's stationary and tough as nails — you can bypass him easily). If you wander down to the Voidfish tank, you'll find that the Voidfish itself has been replaced by a giant violin. You'll have to fight the violin, too. While all of this is happening, though, there is a voice booming through the entire neon base; a man speaking through invisible loudspeakers. He runs through the aforementioned Terms of Service, repeatedly, before his tone suddenly shifts, presumably addressing whoever has made it this far: Get out. Get out. Get out get out get out get out

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[diffidentive]

[Are there any clues to be found in the seating car that might lead to the director? No. No there are not. But that doesn't stop Shuichi from searching the place top to bottom. At one point, he noticed that he wasn't in the car alone, but Sayori seemed so fascinated by the view outside the window that he decided not to bother her.]

[But then...she seems to pass out for seemingly no reason at all and that's more than a little concerning. He moves across the car and kneels down next to her chair, gently shaking one of her shoulders.]

S-Sayori-san? Are you okay?

[hxppythxughts]

[She stirs more like she's just woken from a coma than a nap--still glassy-eyed, and barely moving except for the flutter of her eyelids as they open. After a second, her head lolls over to look at Shuichi, and she blinks blearily a few times like she hasn't quite understood the question.] Huh...?

[diffidentive]

[Yeah...that's definitely not normal? He gives her another gentle little shake, expression only becoming even more concerned.]

Sayori-san...can you hear me?

[hxppythxughts]

[Another blink, and then she squeezes her eyes shut. Her hand comes up to rub at one; as she swipes the side of her hand over her eyelid, she slowly sits up out of her slumped position in the seat.] Ah...

[She lets her hand fall and opens her eyes. Slowly, she looks around, and then stands up from the comfy chair--when she does, the sparkle returns to her gaze almost immediately, and she frowns apologetically.] Geez, sorry. As soon as I sat down I got really sleepy!

[diffidentive]

[The detective sighs softly in relief, his own expression brightening ever so slightly. That's better...]

It's okay, you don't need to apologize. I'm just glad you're okay. You just sort of...passed out without warning.

[He glances back over at the chair she just vacated, casting it a wary look.]

But all you did was sit down? [Weird and ominous.] Did anything odd happen once you fell asleep?

[hxppythxughts]

Hmm, I don't remember any weird dreams. [Her eyebrows furrow in thought as she follows Shuichi's suspicious gaze to the seat.] But when my butt hit the chair, it was like everything in my brain just went-- [she touches her fingers to her forehead and then flings her hand away from her head, splaying her fingers out as she does] --whoosh! Gone!

[diffidentive]

Hmm...

[He frowns, still looking warily at the innocent-looking chair.]

Well...I'm sure it goes without saying, but I think you should avoid sitting down in this car again. [He gets to his feet.] I honestly don't know anything about all this...supernatural...stuff, so I can't even guess what caused it or what would have happened if you'd remained asleep. but... I can't imagine it would have been anything good.

[What if she just...never woke up? And they all just left her on the train forever after they found the Director and went back downstairs?]

Especially since you seemed more like you were coming out of a coma than waking up from a nap, despite the fact that you weren't unconscious for very long...

[hxppythxughts]

[She pouts a little bit at the offending chair.] It's probably enchanted to do that. [And then, turning her head to regard the rest of the car and putting her hands on her hips:] I bet all these seats are!

I get wanting to take a nap, but geez, you have to wake up sometime. [This is something she tells herself very, very often...]

[diffidentive]

[Shuichi glances around the room as well.]

I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case... [Why enchant just one chair? He knew this train was bad news!] I guess whoever trapped the Director up here really doesn't want us finding her...if they're putting up obstacles to delay us like this.

[hxppythxughts]

Yeah. It might not be a trap on purpose, though. I think some things around here are just like that. [Just as a storm does not intend to ruin a garden party, a magical object may not intend to get in your way. This...infected area may have come into existence as a death trap, Lucretia or no.

Either way, Sayori seems...rather unbothered about the idea that some things are just death traps by nature. She smiles at Shuichi.] Thanks for waking me up. It would've been pretty bad if I got stuck there, huh?

[diffidentive]

A-Ah, you're welcome. [His cheeks turn faintly pink and he glances down at the floor.] I think if I hadn't actually seen you fall asleep, and had come by later, I would have just let you keep sleeping. So...you might have been stuck until someone more informed or ruder had come along.

[So, yeah, probably pretty bad.]