balance_logs | Lunar Interlude 4

	I have a feeling that you'll find the next few weeks a little... in-tents.
	NAVIGATION

1. NEW RECLAIMERS

A. WELCOME WAGON

For those of you who will be arriving today, the story is the same: though you may not remember it, there was a moment where you were living out your life, at home or wherever you were ... and then there was the moment the Hunger came. And amid the television static that is your memory of that moment, a hand reached out to you, beckoning your escape as the tendrils of darkness destroyed everything that ever existed about your world.

"Would you hurry this up, please? Your world no longer stands a chance. Come with me, we are the last bastions of hope for all universes everywhere. And we're going to need you."

And then, unceremoniously, you are dragged through the universal wringer and plopped down on the soft, though not quite cushioned, grass of the Moon Base Quad.

You're not alone, either. Along with the newest members of the Bureau, in a fashion probably not unlike this, there are people waiting here for you. People who wanted to see the heroes the Director has managed to bring in this time.

People who are excited to see what you're capable of.

You have a few minutes to talk with each other — or maybe lob a few questions at the impromptu welcoming committee, or any of the older Reclaimers who may happen to be nearby. But before long, you're whisked away to a different area of the Moon Base.

B. THE VOIDFISH

You are quickly divided into four groups, and brought to the easternmost geodesic dome, to an elevator in a well maintained, but sparsely landscaped field. There's nothing particularly ominous feeling about the space — in fact, the two guards who greet you at the elevator entrance seem pleased with your arrival. You are, after all, one of the few chosen by the Director, the few who will reclaim what the Hunger has destroyed.

And in a few moments, you're about to find that out for yourself.

After a tightly packed elevator ride, your group is ushered out to a rather grand looking hall, banners of the Bureau of Balance adorn both sides of smooth metal walls. And inside the Voidfish's chamber stands a tank — impossibly tall, and soaked in a black ink that obscures whatever the tank may be holding.

You may notice a melody, someone playing the violin. It's a bard, on his fourth round of introducing Reclaimers to the Voidfish.

When he's finished, he pulls out a few pieces of paper — sheet music — opens a drawer at the bottom of the tank, drops the papers in, and shuts it.

And swiftly, you feel as if there's something you can't just shake off about the melody you just heard.

If you seem alarmed, the bard takes notice of it.

"Yeah, man, like... don't think too hard about it, it's like that every time. I'm guessing you're here to be inoculated? Just a heads up, you might want to, like, seriously, hold your nose while you drink it down. It tastes wicked gross, man."

You sort of get the sense that he's said this speech once or twice in the past. It's well rehearsed, much like the stories you'd expect a bard to be able to recite.

"Anyway, I'm supposed to tell you that you have a choice. If you drink the black stuff, you'll be able to hear through the, uh... Huh, how do I describe it? Through the [TSHCSCHTSHCHSC] sound. You guys like, hear that? Anyway, it's all about knowledge or something. I don't know, I'm just here to, like, feed the thing. We call it the [TSCHHSCHSCH], by the way.

So, like. You get a choice. You can drink it and understand stuff, or not drink it and then hear that crackling noise all day every day. If I were you, I'd drink it. But, hey man, I'm not like, your dad or anything."

The bard takes five cups and draws liquid from a spigot connected directly to the basin of the large tank. Stormy, muddy looking ichor is drawn into them, one by one. He offers each of you a sip.

Drink it (he wasn't kidding about what it tasted like), and you're inoculated to the wisdom of the Voidfish. You try to remember the song this bard played a few moments ago and the melody, the meter, every octave, all come back to you. And if you think back to your arrival, some of the things you may have heard other people in the Quad say, that simply sounded like static, are suddenly clear. Bureau of Balance. Grand Relic. Reclaimers.

Yet you still can't remember the Hunger or what it had done to your world. And as you look back to the tank in front of you, the water has become clear. There's a jellyfish, as tall as a building, floating within. You look into the body of the creature and you can almost make out a beautiful, tiny universe floating within it.

2. TEST OF INITIATION

You're given approximately 48 hours to sign up for the test of initiation. Outside the Arena is a command console where you can push your biometric signature up against the device, pick a time, and get prepare to take your entrance exam. This one is a little different than the ones before it; the Director has posed a group challenge among her hopeful Reclaimers. One slot contains blank names for four people altogether. Two of them are backlit in a blue background, two in red. It looks like you're going to be competing against other Reclaimers.

At the appointed time, you'll enter the arena's chambers and fill out into one of two rooms. You and your teammate will be allowed to dress and prepare accordingly. From the window, you can see a single, solitary mountain that rises so high you can barely make odds or ends of the peak. An array of items stands before you, four in total. You can only choose two, as the second both of you claim one item, the other two become translucent and untouchable. Placing either of your items back on their pedestals makes them corporeal again. All in all, you have:

○ Booster boots - aids you in climbing and scaling the mountain, quadrupling your jump speed

○ Spiked boots - when landing on a surface of the mountain, it magically locks into place and prevents you from falling or being otherwise deterred in moving upward

○ An enchanted cloth - you're not sure what this is capable of, but if you try it out a little bit, you'll realize it resists the push of air. Essentially, a portable hang glider

○ Grappling hook - standard issue, its reach is about 50 feet. When it locks onto a surface, it's impossible to remove unless a button is pressed on the device to loosen it

Both of your teams must make it to the top. What awaits you there is a wand, standing on an intricately carved, raised dais. The base is made out of stone, but written in very clear, etched letters around the bottom are the words: THE GRAND RELIC, WAND OF PLANAR DISPLACEMENT. Does it sound too good to be true? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. You need to get that relic back down to the entrance room.

The caveat here is if you happen to be tempted, and let's face it, the easy way out is always rather appealing, you can try to use it. It'll take you back down, easily enough, but the wand will not come with you. Looks like you're going to have to trek your way back up there. Either way, the first team to make it down wins the contest. What's the prize, you ask? Gloating rights, mostly.

3. THE REAL CAMPY FUN BEGINS

As The Director mentioned, you will be spending this month on a corporate retreat! And she wasn't kidding when she said she said this retreat will be an exercise in working together. Shortly after the newest Reclaimers are all good and initiated, and shortly after the rest of you have packed what you can, you're all whisked away to Gwynneth — a beautifully lush forest on the Moonshae Isles.

Blanketed in a canopy of lush greens and soft, comfortable grass that seems to grow even in the farthest corners where the light can't reach, the forest looks and feels like something out of a storybook. A peculiar, but not unpleasant, scent that is a blend of sweet olives and cherry blossoms wafts throughout the forest no matter where you turn.

That is to say, for those of you who have been in the Bureau for the while, and are used to roughing it with your BIAS: Welcome! This should be roughly old hat for some of you. Not far from the clearing where you all land are two perfectly lined rows of cabins that are in particularly bad shape. On the door frame of each will contain some information... and you might have guessed it. "BARBARIANS," "FIGHTERS," "PALADINS," "DANCERS," "MONKS," "RANGERS & ROGUES," "BARDS," "SORCERERS," "WARLOCKS," "DRUIDS," "CLERICS," and "SMART PEOPLE." - you get the idea. Each cabin will have just the essentials (creaky bunk beds, chests at the foot of each, and a few spare desks per room). Rest assured, the Director's enchanted the cabins to reject entry to anyone who doesn't fit the proper description that's labeled above each door.

You will... most likely have to clean the place up prior to habitation. Showering, toilets, and mirrors are communal, but divided into stalls in the administrative cabin, adjunct to the Bureau's cabin. And for those of you who don't fit into any of the above (hi Lucas), uh, well. There's an old shack close to where you were dropped off, but you probably don't want to stay inside for too long. It smells like something died in there — and maybe something did.

And boy, does this whole trip have "campy corporate retreat" written all over it. When you arrive, you're informed that your "mission" here, so to speak, is to safely make it through the month's activities, including the penultimate task: Braving what staff is only referring to as the Tomb of Horrors.

But we'll get to that later. Right now, you've got some camping activities to do.

C. GET IN LOSERS WE'RE GOING CAMPING

If there's a camp activity that you can think of, we guarantee that there is space set aside for it, and that a Bureau member The Director brought along to assist the Reclaimers is helping to run it. Here are a few of the more prominent activities to get you started, however:

○ Fight Club/Struggle Tourney/Whatever you want to call it: For those of you who are in clear need of more training, or simply like getting yourself into a good strife, a small arena has been squared and roped off for your said strifing convenience. You can sign up in pairs or go mano a mano against one opponent, but there's a catch.

This activity is about improvising, and learning your fellow Reclaimers' fighting styles — an absolute must for when you're out on the field in the thick of a battle. You will only be allowed to use fighting ring issued weapons. A magical barrier will knock your regular weapon right out of your hands if you try to enter the ring with it!

And, I mean. Who wouldn't want to fight with these Fantasy Costco exclusives? (Note: If you want to join an actual Fight Club, the magic barrier is down for two hours starting at midnight. Use that information how you will.)

○ Arts and Crafts: Another camping given. Stretched out between two large evergreens is an equally large canvas, though short enough that every Reclaimer should be able to reach. You'll be given a paintbrush — magic, of course, according to the Bureau member helping out with this activity. It magically fills itself with paint, allowing you to add color to the canvas without the need for a palette.

Because curiously, it seems you're capable of painting in only one color. And more curiously, it's a color that's very unique to you: no other Reclaimer is going to have the same hex value as what's flowing out of your paintbrush. If you ask her, the Bureau member will smile somewhat pensively, and explain: That paintbrush allows you to paint in the color of whatever energy you're giving off right now. Take this with a grain of salt, of course, but the basic hues can be interpreted as follows:

Red can mean that you have a problem that you need to solve. Yellow means there's a secret that you're keeping from someone important to you. Green elicits a feeling of calmness, but there's something else that you're not allowing yourself to address. Blue means there's something you need to confess, whether it's the fact that you have a crush on someone, or the fact that you stole something or told a lie. White means, simply, an energy at peace.

Of course, you may find yourself painting in any color out there — and they may represent something else, depending on you specifically. Use this prompt however you'd like!

And, that's not to say that these are all things that we need to sit down around the campfire and hash out — though that's an activity later on if you want it! These energies aren't necessarily a bad thing either. It wouldn't be much of a painting, you wouldn't be the person you've grown into right now, if you're always painting in white.

○ Ghost stories: Speaking of campfires, every night, you'll be invited to have a seat at a large campfire and to try to tell your best ghost story. Not too far away from the campfire are four busts of wizardly looking men and women on pedestals. Yes, they are haunted by the very same wizardly looking men and women. And yes, they will be offering frank commentary on whatever story you decide to tell.

I'm just gonna leave this here.

○ Field Day: What's a camping trip without the likes of potato sack races, music, tye-dye booths like you'd find at the typical spring fair, and friendly games of capture the flag? If you find this whole field day thing a little bit childish, then, well ... yeah, you're probably right! But even stuffy old people like Lucretia know that the people even stuffier than she is need a chance to cut loose once in a while. So go right ahead and get yourself a fried charisma oreo.

There's a dunking booth, by the way. Yes, you can dunk the Director if you want.

You might bump into Lucas while you're here. He is having pretty much the worst month right now: sunburned, blown up on histamines and more than ready to go back to the Moon Base where there's air conditioning and technology.

○ Man eff that: If the campy camp activities are a bit too campy for you, then The Director certainly isn't going to twist your arm into participating. Well, actually, she might. A little?

In any case, if you're hellbent on boycotting, you might join Lucas in the aforementioned Smelly Shack, as he tinkers with the tech he managed to bring with him and is generally a pain in the ass about having to be out in the forest. Saru and his band of kitsune, if you remember them from Vista Virs, now full-fledged members of the Bureau, will take you on hunting trips if you're interested. If you need to actually learn how to hunt, then Carey and Killian are here to help.

If you're still gonna be a stick in the corporate retreat mud, then the Director might ask you to clear as big of a path to the Tomb of Horrors as possible (Note: You will not be able to go inside, or find a way inside the Tomb of Horrors, no matter how hard you try. This isn't Breath of the Wild, sadly, you can't defeat Ganon right after falling off the Great Plateau). It's about five miles directly to the east, and behind the thickest and densest part of the forest. Who knows what else you'll find out there? Have fun!

D. AN OVERNIGHT SENSATION

One more thing. Something strange is happening overnight, while everyone is asleep, whether it's in their bedrolls, or holed up in the Smelly Shack.

Something — or someone seems to be draping a blanket of magic over the entire camp, leaving those who were asleep rather susceptible to it. You may find yourself afflicted with any number of inconvenient status effects for the day, whether it's a burn on your arm you can't seem to heal, more, uh. Well. More sleep. You blink, and suddenly, 24 hours have passed. Maybe you enter a 2v2 in the fighting ring and suddenly realize you can't tell friend from foe — even though you'd agreed on the teams before entering.

Maybe all the food suddenly loses its flavor, leaving you to marvel at how intense textures suddenly are. If you happened to be painting in blue, maybe you're suddenly compelled to blurt it out to the next unfortunate soul who passes.

It's a smorgasbord of minor inconveniences. Almost like something's spotted the corporate retreat, and has decided to use its participants as their plaything.

But what?

blurb code by photosynthesis

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ He accepts the burger, suddenly feeling as though he hasn't eaten in years. ]

Hey, thanks.

[ As he unwraps it — and without looking up — he quickly asks, ]

Did everyone else make it?

If you're talkin' reclaimers, you an' Minato were the only ones who died. [No sense in sugar coating it.] Guess a lot of the dwarves and goblins didn't wanna leave even though the whole place was falling, though.

[Sans doesn't really get what they expected to happen, but it's still unfortunate.]

[ Talk about your bad luck. On hearing about the dwarves, McCree looks up, startled. ]

But the ones we rescued from the yarn? Did they at least get down safe?

[ If he died so a bunch of stubborn dwarves could change their minds at the last second... ]

Yeah. [At leas there's that, Sans supposes.] Guess spending a few days tangled up in yarn sorts your priorities in life out a bit.

Yeah.

[ Well, that settles McCree down a little. They did good. They rescued those dwarves. ]

That one still owes me a drink.

[ Somehow he thinks he won't be able to collect, unless that dwarf stays in the exact place they left him. ]

Everybody got dropped off in the same town. You can ask around there later. [Technically, McCree was there too! In some shed as a corpse all wrapped up in web.]

Suppose so. Maybe he decided to settle down as a nice farmer and stay away from forges. I know I would.

[ He stretches and groans as he does so. ]

That was a bad idea.

Most of our missions involve a lot of bad ideas. [Sans is very confident in this conclusion.]

You ain't wrong.

[ He sighs and lets his shoulders rest in a more comfortable position. ]

Guess it'd be too much to ask that there not be things that can kill us every time we turn around.

Maybe next time the relic'll just be sitting around and nobody'll have touched it yet. [Sans absolutely does not think that will happen.]

If only. That's the thing about relics: they tempt people. They even tempt puppies to play with them.

You got me there. Guess the next thing we'll have to worry about'll be a giant bear or somethin'.

Ugh. Don't jinx it, or things will probably go down that way.

Lunar Interlude 4 — corporate retreat

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject