[If he has to go, at least it'll be to the circle of life, where his body will treated like the Denny's special it is, and not... you know, splattered against a wall for deciding to turn a mine cart ride into a roller coaster like he has for the past few days. Dave... don't freak out, it's (almost) safe! He swears.

It also stands to be said, but Ryuji likes Dave however he comes. Cowboy flavor, pajama flavor, sweaty mess flavor, it's a world of snow cone swirls all the way down for him. If it's not painfully obvious to everyone in the world by now, it should be. He wraps an arm around him, still cushioned lush from Theodore's bulking mass up against his back.

Ask him a year ago if he thought that he'd be in the wilderness with a tamed bear, adoring the shit out of his boyfriend just reading a romance novel over his shoulder, and he'd probably be a little flabbergasted at the idea. Or at least blush a whole lot.

God, this book is such a piece of trash. He wholeheartedly loves it.]

Hold on, I'm still caught up in your Morgan Freeman ass.

[He has to think for a second; wasn't the Diadem of Enhanced Fairy Tales supposed to be the holy grail of hot butt bumping? It did seem out of place for the pacing to put it smack dab in the middle of the plot without any credence or understanding of a proper plot pacing.]

Some people need fancy crowns to get laid, I guess? I mean, like. Not me, I'm the Fabio that comes in all dreamy with pecs for like, days, and just sweeps the hero right off his feet. [To shut him up from the potential of protesting that or critiquing it in live time, he kisses the top of his head.]

Maybe the crown possesses you and makes you so sexy-time craved that the rest of the book is just tryin' to break away from its thotness.