[Oh Will, have more of a sense of self-preservation. The further this goes, the more awkwardly personal and emotional it's going to get and then both of you will remember it, forever. As it is, he's already nudging Will's ribs with an elbow at that first quip.]
What? People hang out over food, it's a whole thing. A human thing, I guess. We're hangin' out, ain't we? ...Arisato's dead, anyway.
[That's the first thing that seems to properly affect this pleasant mood of Shinjiro's; he looks sad for a minute, gaze dropping to the ground as his shoulders hunch inward in a more typical defensiveness.]
Feel kinda shitty about that. He ain't the one it's supposed to happen to, and I wasn't even there. Maybe I coulda caught him, like that time with Lion.
[Somewhat idly, he takes another bite of the apple. Eating your feelings is a valid approach, right. Even when it magically results in more feelings.]
Anyway, it ain't that I blame 'em. It's just--a lot of pressure. They all want me to be happy so bad, and I can't tell 'em how I'm still strugglin' just to get through the day.
[Turns out magical apples can't actually cure depression. What a tweest.]
The more I give a shit about these people, the more I don't wanna hurt 'em. But that ain't made me wanna be here any more, y'know? Which just kind of sucks. I still get this itchy feelin' like I oughta do somethin', get out before it'd be real bad, but I dunno what to do. It freaks me out. But it's different with you, and that sounds like a low-key diss but it ain't. I dunno how to explain it, either.
[The comment about how lucky he is (was) for his friendship with Aki goes ignored; that's a wound that's too raw to dig his fingers into, even with this urge that keeps bubbling in the pit of his stomach to keep on talking. The issue's mentally backed away from before he even consciously thinks about it.
He's still going to regret so much of this later, though, when he's back in a state of mind that realizes that Will is going to have all this recorded in his memory permanently to potentially quote back to him at any time. . . .press f for this poor boy's dignity.]
cw for reference to suicidal ideation
What? People hang out over food, it's a whole thing. A human thing, I guess. We're hangin' out, ain't we? ...Arisato's dead, anyway.
[That's the first thing that seems to properly affect this pleasant mood of Shinjiro's; he looks sad for a minute, gaze dropping to the ground as his shoulders hunch inward in a more typical defensiveness.]
Feel kinda shitty about that. He ain't the one it's supposed to happen to, and I wasn't even there. Maybe I coulda caught him, like that time with Lion.
[Somewhat idly, he takes another bite of the apple. Eating your feelings is a valid approach, right. Even when it magically results in more feelings.]
Anyway, it ain't that I blame 'em. It's just--a lot of pressure. They all want me to be happy so bad, and I can't tell 'em how I'm still strugglin' just to get through the day.
[Turns out magical apples can't actually cure depression. What a tweest.]
The more I give a shit about these people, the more I don't wanna hurt 'em. But that ain't made me wanna be here any more, y'know? Which just kind of sucks. I still get this itchy feelin' like I oughta do somethin', get out before it'd be real bad, but I dunno what to do. It freaks me out. But it's different with you, and that sounds like a low-key diss but it ain't. I dunno how to explain it, either.
[The comment about how lucky he is (was) for his friendship with Aki goes ignored; that's a wound that's too raw to dig his fingers into, even with this urge that keeps bubbling in the pit of his stomach to keep on talking. The issue's mentally backed away from before he even consciously thinks about it.
He's still going to regret so much of this later, though, when he's back in a state of mind that realizes that Will is going to have all this recorded in his memory permanently to potentially quote back to him at any time. . . .press f for this poor boy's dignity.]