Welcome Participartypants

[balancemod]

Who: All y'all nerds
Where: The Arena
When: The night of the 15th
What: A small gathering to both welcome new members to the Bureau, and to congratulate veteran Reclaimers on their successful magic mitten procurement. Dress is as fancy or as not fancy as you want it. Manners, to the degree of which you are capable, are mandatory.
Content Warning: General content warning for the Reclaimers. Also general content warning for Miss Zarves

Formal, informal, never mind the dress code. NAVIGATION It's been two weeks since the Reclaimers returned, and since the newest Reclaimers arrived. Some of you have adapted better than the Director could have hoped, and some of you have made your best efforts to find a new sense of normalcy — testing Bender the food robot to his limits, forming book clubs, training together, musing over what sort of fashions one even wears to a party. Some of you, perhaps, have spent a little bit too much time in the simulation at the Dojo. It's understandable. Adjusting to the idea that your entire universe has been destroyed takes time, and sometimes, escapes are necessary. And tonight, she's hoping to provide you with a temporary escape with this party. 1. ONCE UPON A TWO WEEKS' WEARY A. TO WASH AWAY THE ACHING BLEARY The Director, using the Moon Base's simulation technology, has turned the Arena into a ballroom to behold. The sprawling hall is decorated in ornate wooden carvings, and a large maple floor meant for dancing is encircled by tables and a large banquet table. In the corner, on a raised platform, stands a baby grand piano, freshly tuned and polished. Anyone is free to have a spin on it, if the mood strikes. At some point during the evening, Johann the Bard, violin in hand, will stand on the platform and provide a performance that could only ever be heard on the Moon Base, among members of the Bureau of Balance — because he did, after all, give this particular song to the Voidfish. If you would like something with a heavier beat, there's a tablet on the wall next to the platform, where you can make music requests of your own, from the Artificer's collection of songs from across the universe. The collection may not be all that extensive, but The Cupid Shuffle is probably in there. Get down and boogie, is what we're saying. B. THEY WERE THROWN A BANQUET CHEERY And what's on the banquet table? Snacks provided by Bender, of course — which means they could have any manner of magical effects. Here are some of the snacks available, including one that the Director was lucky enough to roll for herself. Cupcakes of every flavor imaginable, utterly delicious — so delicious, in fact, that whoever eats one will have flowers grow in their footsteps for the next two hours. The flowers are magic and disappear on their own, so go turn the dance floor into a garden (Courtesy of Lion). Mead that puts you in such a good mood, you'll be unable to resist the urge to sing in whatever measure of talent you have (Courtesy of Lancelot). An energy drink that will literally give you wings for two hours. Enjoy looking absolutely angelic for your friends (Courtesy of Akechi). Nachos that have a curiously JPG quality to them, but no other magical effects (Courtesy of Terezi). The most delicious cheeseburgers you ever did taste (Courtesy of Maya). Finger sandwiches that, when eaten, light up your entire body in an assortment of different colors — the light trails behind your movements, like the way lights look on a low shutter speed. Enjoy the raving (courtesy of The Director). 2. BUT THEN, SHE ROSE FROM THE ICHOR Some of you may have heard a thing or two about Miss Zarves — perhaps the rumors circulating around town, or the strange connection to Garfield and the Bracer Chasers some of you may have bought to decorate your Bracers. Maybe words like "catalyst" and "Ouija Board" have come up once or twice. Because there is a being trapped in a plane of existence right next to yours, largely forgotten, as if she had somehow been reverse Voidfish'd. Forgotten, that is, until the Bracer Chasers — curiously laced with high amounts of aluminadium, a word that might sound familiar to McCree and Faolan. For two years, she's waited, and watched, wanting a chance to be seen again, to speak with the Bureau herself once again, cursed with a maddening loneliness. And the second one of those cute decorations was pressed against a Bracer, Miss Zarves had it — her catalyst. She would know, after all: She was once a leading researcher on using catalysts to travel through dimensions, after all — and the Bracer Chasers were one of her original designs. At the very end of the party, perhaps one or two piano songs away from shutdown, the simulation suddenly shuts down. The lights blink off with a systemwide shudder. After five seconds, the lights flare back to life, and the entire Arena is its default white blank slate. And a message, from username @Zarves❤Scarves, slowly blinks across the screen. Hello. I would like to play a game. And then the Arena goes dark. A. HACKER VOICE: I'M IN That little stunt isn't the only one Miss Zarves, who now has a connection to the dimension you're residing in and some of the Bureau tech, is going to pull. For the rest of your stay at the Moon Base, until you're whisked away to the next mission (Or unless you figure out a way to stop her), you may experience some of the following: Wonky simulations: You may have been traveling to the Dojo to recall a certain piece of your home world. And maybe one day, while you're minding your own business, that same simulation may suddenly appear outside the Dojo. Or perhaps you're wandering down a hallway, and you come across a mishmash of other people's simulations, torn apart and stitched back together haphazardly. Bender: As if this guy weren't a big enough mess already. If you happen to ask Bender for one of the items that were available at the party, you may instead be given food that has the opposite effect. Think cupcakes that leave behind wilted plants, mead that makes you cry uncontrollably, or energy drinks that not only do not give you literal wings, but put you straight to sleep. If you happen to have a subscription to Webflix, regardless of what movie you pick to watch, it'll pick a specific movie instead: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. Also, you won't be able to turn it off. 3. AND THEN THINGS JUST KEEP GETTING WORSE The arena's simulation has decided to take a sabbatical, a spectral being from another plane of existence has invaded the Moon Base, and Madame Director is doing her best to keep the room calm and collected. First, the darkness needs to be handled with properly, so with a stomp of her elegant white oak staff down on the floor, a sound echoes above and beyond any panicked shouts, and soon the room is filled with dancing lights that emanate from the four cardinal directions of the arena. "Ladies and gentlemen! Excuse me. Thank you everyone for coming to this enchanted evening here with your fellow Reclaimers, but without proper lighting- Johann, Johann, please, I don't need signature music right now, this isn't a wrestling match for crying out- thank you, Johann. As I was saying- unfortunately, this evening's events will have to be---" Almost right on cue, as if there wasn't a possibly worse time in the world for this to happen, the doors of the arena bust open. Into the room swarms a dragonborn, looking rather beat up and worse for wear. It's impossible to tell if Dragonborn can cry the way humans can cry, but her amphibian-like eyes shine oddly in the colors of the magical lights surrounding the room. The Director's eyes go wide for a moment, this was rather- no, extremely, unsuspected. The Regulator approaches the Director. "We found him! Lucretia, we found him! And h-he. That son of a bitch has Killian!" And lacking in the proper finesse that's demanded of her as a leader, she rubs her forehead. "Carey, come with me to my office and we'll sort this out." She looks around the room, her Reclaimers all gathered and standing, watching this interaction take place. "Please, everyone, return to your apartments for the evening." A. TWO WEEKS UNTIL ROLLOUT The Director hasn't slept a wink throughout the night, dealing with a host of problems facing the Bureau at the moment. She consults with the clerics on how to get rid of this ridiculous joke-entity that Garfield has proliferated long enough. She speaks with Carey about all the details she can offer, attempting to calm her down, despite her unraveled state. Killian means the world to Carey, after all, and the Director, no- Lucretia, was waiting for the wedding invitation for far too long. Sometime around mid-day, the Reclaimers will receive a message on their bracer from her. Reclaimers, we will deploying in approximately two weeks. We've discovered the location of a relic that we haven't heard about in quite some time now. A full briefing will be provided at a later date, but please prepare accordingly. The area you all will be assigned to is known as the Netheril, a vast desert that splits the continent in half between the western and eastern fronts. We've instructed the tailors to offer special clothing designs that are particularly good for protection against sand and heat — at a heavily discounted price. Ensure that you have a weapon, as there's no telling what sort of beasts you can encounter out in such a wasteland. Train intensively over the next few days. We anticipate that it will be quite some time before you are able to return to Base, so please ensure that your BIAS is restocked and ready to go. Two weeks. blurb code by photosynthesis

Comments

[oculusriffs]

Yeah, dude, I know my shit when it comes to standing around in stupidly blistering heat. You need shades, and you need long sleeves.

[even if horse kigurumi guy doesn't exactly back up that claim with his résumé, he at least seems confident enough about it.]

Here, I'll pick out a pair for you.

[grakraka]

[Well, if Dave is confident in this, then he'll trust him. Dave seems quite smart all things considered, so sure. Why not.]

Very well. I leave this task in your hands.

[oculusriffs]

[god damn Akechi's subtweeting in the brackets game is intense.]

[once they're standing next to a ridiculously large display of shades that would make any kid inexperienced in the art of wearing sunglasses 24/7 quake in their quest boots, though, Dave is all business. Akechi will get a choice between oversized, fashionable oval shades, a practical pair with extra UV protection that is not nearly as cool looking, or just a plain pair of aviators. the latter doesn't protect one's peripheral vision as well as you'd think, but that's not the reason Dave rocks the pair on his own face.]

Change that "picking out a pair" to "narrowing it down."

[grakraka]

[Akechi would be a pro at subtweeting and we all know it.

Meanwhile he looks at the glasses choices. Well, at least he understands Dave picking for his own taste and he appreciates the practical option but the first are just too much. Those are frankly off the table. As for the aviators, he does at least try them on since they're such a classic look but...]

I think the middle pair will protect better than these. [Which is surprising, since they're the ones Dave wears.] Ah, not to insult yours, I just...

[oculusriffs]

Nah, dude, you can go ahead and say it.

[this is the same kid who decided he'd rock a starchy suit for the sake of looking snappy on a planet made of lava.]

I've kinda come to appreciate brutal honesty, so by all means, lay it on me.

[grakraka]

Oh.

[People are going to convince him to stop being polite at this rate.]

Well, you did make a good attempt with these ones, so I will say that. I know they're fashionable during some times but these days, minimalism is much more popular as a choice. I frankly think I would look ridiculous in them. Though I must admit I'm curious about the aviators since I've seen them often in older American movies. They're sort of a go-to classic but I wouldn't really see anyone wear them now. The middle option is very middle. I wouldn't say it's bad or good, so much as gets the job done. But, hm, maybe I should pick the bigger pair...? I always overthink glasses.

[And everything. But especially glasses.]

[oculusriffs]

There you go, before you know it you'll have peeled back your inner filter and we'll all get to be front row in the splash zone. Like at Sea World.

[this really isn't a habit you should be trying to impress on people, Dave. blurtscapades get people in trouble. or admitting to their crushes at the worst possible moment.]

Anyway, you should go with whatever your first impulse was.

[grakraka]

[He can't help a snort.]

If I peeled away my inner filters, it would be more like being lost in the Haunted Mansion. [Horrifying and full of sudden scares, scares in this case being God knows what sort of insults or simply depressing or cynical quips.] But thank you, you gave me a good idea of what I like and dislike actually. I had never thought about it.

[oculusriffs]

I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be interpreting that. Are you saying you're full of ghost puns?

[make final arrangements now! we’ve been dying to have you...]

[that's actually just a semi-accurate guess, Dave has never been subjected to Disney theme park rides before.]

But yeah, dude, it's no problem. No point in doing or wearing any kinda shit if you're not into it.

[grakraka]

[Puns. No?? The lowest form of humour, unless he makes them. Then they're high art.]

Thank you. That's quite supportive. Are you a sunglasses connoisseur?

[oculusriffs]

I've always worn 'em, if that's what you mean. These, though? Originally meant to be ironic.

[said as he reaches up to tap at the edge of his own aviators.]

[grakraka]

Ah, is that so? I read once that there is always a hint of sincerity in any ironic action.

[oculusriffs]

Yeah, those're the ones who are shit at it.

[that's ... pretty obviously not a sincere statement. it's all puffed up and full of shitty hubris, a bravado that deflates shortly after it was trotted out. a person with hyper ironic turbo shields always up and armed ... that's not really the sort of person Dave's been very slowly changing out of over the past half a year.]

[so he settles, and actually says something sincere — and not inaccurate to Akechi's comment.]

Nah, my best bro from back home gave me these. The irony's in the fact that he meant them as a joke, but I actually fucking love 'em.

So, you aren't wrong.

[grakraka]

[At first he's a little surprised. Not that Dave doesn't seem blunt—frankly he just seems to have zero filter at all—but it feels somewhat... defensive? But then Dave continues and it seems more like his regular tone.]

Aha, I see. That's rather sweet in my opinion. Truthfully, it's a little hard to picture you without them. They look nice on you and seem to suit you.