[It doesn't bother him much. If he reflects on it, he can find points in time when what he felt towards Akira wasn't the rivalry or the hatred or even the desire to be his friend, though all of those still stand. The fact that they all still remain might make it worse.

He snorts, dropping his arm over his face.]

Are you joking? I have to try to get rid of these feelings now that I've become aware of them and, as you may have noticed, I am not particularly good at doing that.