[God, she's already balancing so many things about this interaction and he's just given her at least three more plates to spin on top of that. It's not entirely that she doesn't want to say the rest; it's true that admitting to her aversion to Monika feels awful, but it's not like that part is a well kept secret. The difficult part is that if she says yes, she may have to explain that something happened between her and Monika. And if she says that then it could lead to a whole lot of things that she frankly doesn't think Ogata is equipped to deal with.
Ah, the pinch of her fingers at the corners of the photograph has tightened a bit. She forces herself to relax her grip and slips her hands into her pockets, one of them taking the photo with it.
If Ogata already thinks she's lying, then that's what he'll think regardless of how she continues. And he's not very trusting, for good reason, so she's sure there's nothing special about her in this interaction—but there's still a sick, sour note of vindication as she scuffs the toe of her shoe against the ground. She knew eventually that someone would see her for the lie that she is. It feels about as awful as she expected.
The boy gazes at her from within the mirror, and she lifts her head and meets his eyes with a certain...emptiness. It's not the same as Ogata's, not like a black hole. There's an exhausted quality to it, like the hole of a grave that someone forgot to stop digging.
no subject
Ah, the pinch of her fingers at the corners of the photograph has tightened a bit. She forces herself to relax her grip and slips her hands into her pockets, one of them taking the photo with it.
If Ogata already thinks she's lying, then that's what he'll think regardless of how she continues. And he's not very trusting, for good reason, so she's sure there's nothing special about her in this interaction—but there's still a sick, sour note of vindication as she scuffs the toe of her shoe against the ground. She knew eventually that someone would see her for the lie that she is. It feels about as awful as she expected.
The boy gazes at her from within the mirror, and she lifts her head and meets his eyes with a certain...emptiness. It's not the same as Ogata's, not like a black hole. There's an exhausted quality to it, like the hole of a grave that someone forgot to stop digging.
Her voice is quiet. Sad, perhaps.] Just once.
Not for very long.